Stardate 50476.3
Captain Kathryn Janeway entered her quarters in a state of utter exhaustion. It had been a hell of a week. The Borg had been in full force and it had taken the better part of the last four days to extinguish the small part of the collective that had intercepted Voyager. It was time for a long deserved - and needed - soak in a bubble bath. To the Captain, this sounded like Heaven, especially since she would be expected to wake in a mere five hours to once again take over the head of the ship.
"Thank goodness for coffee," she thought. "Oh my, it will be close to a stretch of the imagination if I can actually make it to bed before I fall asleep. I think I remember falling asleep in the tub the last time I was able to do this. No time for that tonight. I better be careful..."
Janeway took advantage of her time in the bath until the water began to chill down. She stepped out and made her way over to the towel rack to dry off. After getting completely dry, she slipped into her nightgown and turned off the light while walking into the bed chamber area of her quarters. As she was turning down her blankets on the bed, the lights flickered.
"Huh, that's odd. I wonder what's going on..." she said under her breath. There was a whoosh and the covers tucked themselves back up to the top of the mattress.
“Hi-ah, Kathy!”
“Captain to the bridge, intruder alert!”
“Oh, Kathy, you know they can’t hear you right now. I’m hurt that you’d even try…”
“Well, Q, I never know when you’re going to slip up. Now show yourself.”
Snap and he appeared. He looked like his usual Q self to Janeway.
“What do you want?” she asked with a bit of disdain in her voice.
There was another flash. She blinked, and when she opened her eyes, the scene around her had changed dramatically. It looked as if they were standing in the middle of an old farmhouse based on the American Great Plains. She knew right away that she must be in the Q Continuum.
“Why, in all the universe, did you bring me here?” she asked, exasperated.
Q gestured over to a crib on the side of the adjoining room. In it sat the very alert baby that Janeway had watched Q and his mate conceive the last time they had been together.
“You are Junior’s godmother, Kathy. You agreed to that the last time we saw each other. Well, a part of the job of the godmother is to babysit on occasion. I need you to do that for me now, mainly because nobody else will do it. I’ll be back in a few…”
“A few what? Hours? Days? Minutes? I have a ship to run!”
“Oh, I know,” he said with a smile, “I won’t be gone long and you can get back to your precious ship. Daddy just needs a little break.”
With that and a wink, he disappeared, leaving Janeway to her own devices with a toddler Q.
“Well, well, little one. What shall we do with ourselves? You’re not, by any chance, ready for a nap are you? No, probably not. That would be asking entirely too much,” she sighed.
The baby just looked up at her and gave her this little grin that turned into a giggle that turned into uncontrollable fits of laughter.
“What is going on? He acts like I’ve sprouted horns or something,” she said as she looked around for her reflection. There was a mirror on the wall behind her. When her eyes fell on it, she gasped. Where her nose had once been, there was now the trunk of an elephant and on her forehead were the deep ridges of a Klingon. She was mortified, more by the nose than the Klingon forehead. She thought that looked pretty neat. She turned around to the still-laughing baby and grinned which made him laugh even harder. She hadn’t thought to open her mouth to the mirror, but when she did, she was met with green teeth and a serpent’s tongue.
“Okay, little man. This is starting to be a bit much. You had better change me back to the way I was now.”
He just giggled some more. This went on for the next two and a half hours. She went through changes from every species she’d ever encountered and some that she’d never heard of before. The most disturbing for her was when the boy had her looking like a Borg. She’d had enough of those creatures for one lifetime, she didn’t need to be one (or just look like one), too.
Just as Janeway was beginning to lose her cool with the little tyke, an amazing thing happened. Q returned!
“Q, turn me back to my original self right now! I’ve had about enough of this…”
“Ah, now you know why only a godmother will watch him for me. Very well. You know, this is only a phase he’s going through. Most everyone does, only at a much older age. He’s very grown up for his young life.”
He turned her back into the Kathryn Janeway that she was used to being. When that was finished, he looked over at the crib and smiled a huge grin.
“He’s sleeping! He never takes a nap mid-afternoon. You plum tuckered him out, Kathy. I’m going to have to keep you on my babysitting short list.”
“Oh, joy,” she said. “Well, you know, it really wasn’t all that bad. He didn’t hurt me or anything. It was just disconcerting to have an elephant nose, Klingon ridges, and a Borg ocular implant. All at once, no less.”
“Yes, I can see where that would be strange. Well, as promised, it’s time for you to go back to Voyager. Thank you so much for that little break.”
“You are very welcome,” she said as she realized that she was back in her quarters. She looked at the time. None had passed since the whole ordeal began. “Oh, good,” she said with relief, “I can get my full five hours in,” as she climbed into bed.
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